An Easy Guide To Becoming Your Best Self
We all want to be the best versions of ourselves. We want to see our potential, and we want to live up to it! That little voice inside of us says: “you can do and be better!” But we feel overwhelmed about where to start.
Before diving into the guide to becoming your best self, it’s important to know that you must first accept yourself exactly as you are. If you cannot do this, then you will never be satisfied with the progress you made. We WILL morph and change and grow. So let’s be intentional about those changes!
Another important thing to know is that you are uniquely created, so you must bring pieces of YOU into each one of these tips. None of these tips work the same for everyone. Instead of trying to fit yourself into these tips, fit these tips into what works for YOU!
Let’s begin the easy guide to becoming your best self:
1. Shift your perspective.
When you experience negative feelings, take on a new perspective! What is another way you can look at your situation? Step into the shoes of another or take on a “bird’s eye view” — how would an outsider see your situation? This is where you have to remember your power to choose and the power of your thoughts.
Here is a recent example I wrote on my Facebook page:
“Do you ever wish people would be different than who they are? You know, that boss, or spouse, or relative who you butt heads with every time you make contact? You have an entire manual in your head of how they SHOULD behave. If they followed those “rules” they would be SO much better off, right?
We think things like: ‘She should be kinder.’ ‘He should be more like [blank].’ ‘If he would just [blank] then I could finally feel [blank].’
But did you know that wishing people were different than who they are (or how they behave) is actually causing YOU misery? It’s painful to wish change upon a person. Let go of the circumstances of people you can’t change and learn to change your thoughts!
You can choose better for yourself! You don’t have to suffer because of a negative thought you can’t let go. Sure, you can’t change your circumstance, but you can change your thoughts about the circumstance. So when your boss is on your tail or when your husband/wife doesn’t meet your expectations, tell yourself thoughts that uplift rather than tear down.
‘She is doing the best she can.’
‘My worth is not defined by his actions.’
‘He does great at [blank].’
Start thinking thoughts that give you the result you want! If you want to feel resentment or bitterness, keep thinking old thoughts. But, if you want a better result, change your thought patterns and build new ones! It takes work, and it takes practice, but you will be happier with the results!”
2. Stop complaining.
Some people believe that as long as they aren’t outwardly complaining to others about their lives or circumstances than they aren’t a “complainer,” but complaining goes much deeper than this. Complaining reaches into your self-talk as well. Monitor that voice that speaks to who you are. Are you talking positively about yourself or wishing your life looked different? Note: wishing your life looked different and taking ACTION and wishing your life looked different and COMPLAINING.
Complaining leads us to nowhere but misery. Choose better for yourself and be aware of your inner voice.
3. Accept who you are.
This goes back to what I said at the beginning. We all want acceptance and yet we rarely offer this gift to ourselves. But the only way that others will accept us is when we accept ourselves!
Choose to see yourself for your strengths and who God created you to be — not for your flaws and disappointments.
If we all lived our lives based on our potential, we would be leading much more fulfilling lives.
For example, let’s say there are two people who think they should have written a book by now. One of these people looks at herself with disappointment for all the wasted time that could have been used to write her book. She’s already living her life as if she has failed. The other person hasn’t yet started his book, but he looks at his life feeling gratitude for all that he has experienced that will one day make great content for his book. He lives each day looking for “book potential.” Which person do you want to be?
Accept where you are and see yourself for all your potential and capabilities.
4. Know what you stand for and against.
It’s important to know what you stand FOR and what you stand AGAINST. There will be controversial topics that come along and you may see yourself flailing from one side to the other on the issue, but take some time to really figure out what you believe! Also, know your values! What are the things in life that are important to you? What are the hills you will die on? People who know what they believe and understand their values tend to live happier lives.
5. Make time for self-reflection.
People today are overwhelmed and underutilized because they don’t take time for this simple thing…reflection. When you make time to self-reflect, it’s like taking foggy glasses, wiping them clean, and seeing a clearer vision of the same picture in front of you. The picture may not change, but the lens you use makes a big difference. You start to see the beauty. You start to see the way out. And you start to see yourself as a valuable piece of the picture and not one that feels fear because you can’t see clearly.
Self-reflection also helps you better utilize your time and energy. You learn to see what’s important and what is eating up holes in your time without producing anything worthwhile.
Make time to reflect.
Note: If you need guidance on this, please reach out to me! I would love to discuss this in more depth!
6. Nurture your relationships.
It’s easy to think about what others can do for US, but when you are living your best life, you think about what you can be doing for the other person. Relationships are important yet are often the first thing we neglect when life gets busy. People who are living their best lives are surrounded by healthy relationships! This doesn’t mean that everyone you invest in has to be living THEIR best lives. It simply means that you have the proper boundaries put in place and a mutual respect. Relationships should make both people involved mutually better.
Of course, there are always more things we can add to this list, but I believe these six tips will give you a great starting point. Most other things you can do to better your life will fall under these categories. Let me know how I can be supporting you on this journey to your best self — whether through 1:1 coaching , encouragement on my Facebook page or by joining my coaching membership when we reopen.
Check out my FREE email series called 7-Days to a Better Life for more tips!
We are in this together!